Hard Driving
There were several days of soft snow which made life hard for the doggy men
but harder for the dogs. I could tolerate that, and sympathised, but have
to admit to losing it when two or three dogs decided they'd go on strike on
a good day. The words shamefully recall my occasional misguided and
ignorant ill treatment of the dogs - I hope other drivers remember their
cruelty with similar guilt and shame. It is sung to the tune "Messing About
on the River" - remember it? - late fifties or early sixties.
With dogs on the run
It's no bleedin' fun
When stopping the bastards from stalling
Though it knackers your voice
Sod all is your choice
And the whole bloody business is galling
There's Whisky and Luqa and Stroma and Skye
Who'll sit in their arses whilst others trot by
So you thump 'em like hell
'Til they get up as well
Then you carry on cursing and balling
The reference to "thumping" indicates the barbaric treatment of beating
uncooperative dogs with a specially spliced short length of heavy rope
called a thumper. This inhumanity was taught down the generations of dog
drivers and regrettably unquestioned until one Harry Wiggans arrived on the
scene. He trained and cared for the dogs and never needed a thumper.
Dog fights were mercifully rare but when they did happen it was when the
dogs were harnessed and excited ready for the first run of the day. One
dog might knock another accidentally, or snap from impatience and all hell
would let loose in a nine dog fight if you were not quick. Jaws would lock
onto anything canine and accessible and it was widely believed that if you
simply pulled the dogs apart it was likely one or two animals would still
have the ears, or other anatomical parts, of their opponents between their
teeth. In one fight however, I foolishly delved in amongst them and felt a
pair of fangs pierce my gloves and my hand. The dog, Changi, instantly let
go however, and backed out of the fight! Actually that was my introduction
to dogs and at the start of my first run with them. It was also my first
use of the thumper - I missed and hit my co-driver and mentor, Colin
Wornham, squarely on the crown of his head. He backed out of the fight
also!